-
Step 1
How to Cope: Take good care of yourself
Step 1 (or Powertool 1) in the Beyond Blame System is the foundation for everything else you will do to better manage your relationship with your loved one. In this step, you'll learn how to handle emotions like depression, worry, guilt, shame, and solve physical issues like difficulty sleeping, headaches, and stomach problems.
-
Step 2
How to Cope: Uncover What Keeps You Feeling Stuck
Step 2 (or Powertool 2) in the Beyond Blame System is about feeling in control. Do you feel unable to make decisions because danger lies in every choice, yet you feel compelled to do something? Are you damned if you do, damned if you don't? If so, then you're feeling stuck.
-
Step 3
How to Cope: Communicate to Be Heard
Step 3 (or Powertool 3) in the Beyond Blame System is about listening and feeling heard. It's tough to communicate with people who have personality disorders because the disorder garbles both incoming and outgoing messages, causing massive chaos and confusion.
-
Step 4
How to Cope: Set Limits with Love
Step 4 (or Powertool 4) in the Beyond Blame System is about boundaries. When I asked members of my Welcome to Oz Online Family Community, "What happened when you set limits with your family member?" they say things like, ""I told him he didn't understand my perspective; he told me I didn't understand his." In this step, you'll learn to set limits with clarity and confience.
-
Step 5
How to Cope: Reinforce the Right Behavior
Step 5 (or Powertool 5) in the Beyond Blame System has to do with how you act, not what you say. Now that you've set your limits and communicated them to your family member, the next step (step 5) is learning how to maintain them. The key is to remember that the real message is not what you say, but what you do.
Welcome to BPD Central
People with borderline personality disorder see people as all good or all bad and have extreme, blink-of-an-eye mood swings. Their fear of abandonment, combined with feelings of emptiness and self-loathing, makes others feel like they're constantly walking on eggshells.
Some borderline individuals are suicidal and self-harm. Other rage, criticize, and make wild accusations. People with BPD suffer, and so do those around them. About a third of people with BPD also have narcissistic personality disorder (NPD); they are especially unwilling to look at themselves and their own behavior.
I'm here to help. Tour this site, buy a book, learn about the Beyond Blame system, or join an online support group.There is hope.
-
The Essential Family Guide to Borderline Personality Disorder
New Tools and Techniques to Stop Walking on Eggshells
-
The Stop Walking on Eggshells Workbook
Practical Strategies for Living with Someone Who Has Borderline Personality Disorder
-
Stop Walking on Eggshells
Taking Your Life Back When Someone You Care About Has Borderline Personality Disorder
-
The ABC'S of BPD
The Basics of Borderline Personality Disorder for Beginners
-
Splitting
Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder
-
The Splitting Companion CD
Conversations with William A. Eddy
-
.jpg)
You're My World: The Custody CD
Featuring Ken Lewis and James Paul Shirley
-
Love and Loathing
Protecting Your Mental Health When Your Partner has Borderline Personality Disorder
-
Dealing with High-conflict People in Separation, Divorce, and Co-parenting CD Set
Presented by Bill Eddy with Megaln Hunter
-
Dealing with High Conflict People in Divorce (Without Children) 4-disc CD set
Presenter: Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.
-
Hope for Parents
Helping Your Borderline Son or Daughter Without Sacrificing Your Family or Yourself